Posts Tagged ‘stoop and scoop’

It’s raining cats and buttons

November 18, 2009

I am a dog person. Before all you cat lovers write in on behalf of your furry felines, let me say clearly: I am not anti-cat – I am only anti-itchy eyes, which I get whenever I pet a cat. Hence I am definitely a dog person. Plus – as someone once noted – DOG is GOD spelled backwards, whereas CAT is TAC, which means nothing, so I think dog lovers may be on the winning side of this particular argument. I’m just saying.

Biker in his leather jacket

Unlike me, my dog Biker does hate cats. It goes way beyond the itchy eye thing with him. However Biker is not a targeted racist – he takes equal offence at rabbits, quail, squirrels – pretty much any kind of critter that happens to cross his path while we are out for our walks. Me? There is only one kind of critter that gets my dander up – it walks on two legs, and has its own pooch on a leash. It is the “Non-Pooper-Picker-Upper.”

I am an upstanding dog owner – meaning I stand upright until I need to stoop and scoop. Then I faithfully stoop, scoop, and carry my Biker’s baggie back home for disposal. Responsible dog owners do. But there is always an NPPU to give the rest of us a bad name.

In my neighbourhood, one “Mr. X” (so-called because X marks the spot you do not want to step in) has taken to walking his little dog, Buttons (an alias, for purposes of this blog) along my daily route. Buttons is darling, as cute as a – well, you know. But Mr. X is not into picking up little Buttons’s “buttons.” Which are not that little, I might add. I have been “buttoned” on more than one occasion.

What’s more, neighbours have begun to notice the “button” accumulation, and are giving me and Biker the evil eye. Which is just wrong. There is no confusing Buttons’s buttons with Biker’s – Biker’s are more … well, let’s not go there. I suppose neighbours can’t be expected to know that. Still, in order to safeguard my dog’s honour, lately I’ve been forced to do double duty. Many’s the day I arrive home with one relieved dog and two smelly baggies.

It’s a small price to pay for being a dog owner and a good neighbour. Oh, I love both dogs and cats. It’s the NPPU’s I’d like to teach a few tricks. Or just sink my teeth into.

Where do you stand in the “dog” vs. “cat” debate?  (hopefully not on a button!)

© Judith Millar 2009. All rights reserved.

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